Are You a Veteran Internet Dater?

More and more people are, according to sociologist Michael Rosenfeld’s research of 3,000 American couples. While introductions from friends remain the greatest source of matches, Internet sites have surpassed family referrals, the workplace, school, church and the corner bar as the way people find dating partners. Three types of couples most likely to have met their mate online are gay men, lesbians, and straight folks aged 35-44 (AZ Republic, February 14, 2010).

I expect these numbers will grow as more people become comfortable with social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter. The Internet is especially helpful when you’re looking for someone specific, such as a person who loves skydiving and Indian food and speaks French.

I tried a number of Internet dating sites when I was in my late forties and looking. While I think it’s worth trying, I didn’t have much success dating people I met online. (Of course not one friend fixed me up with anyone, so my experience really did not fit the norm!) Many of the men I encountered were not interested in a committed relationship and most wanted to date younger women. Before I met Roger I did date a few men who were my age, but I met all of them at singles events.

Still, I know of several successful relationships that began online, and you may have a different experience than I had. A great resource for online dating, especially for women just getting back to the dating scene, is Finding The Right Man For You: Dating Advice for Women by Lawrence J. Danks. Danks met his wife through online dating, so he knows how to do it right.

No matter what approach you take, if you want to meet someone, you need to stay in the game. The biggest mistake I see people make is leaving too early or giving up too soon. A good friend used to remind me that it’s a numbers game, and I think she’s right. Get out there and have some fun – and be sane!