Handling First Dates - Part One

As I discussed last week, singles events can take us out of our comfort zones.  If you’ve been successful at working the room and meeting new people, you ideally will be faced with the next major challenge: the dreaded first date. 

Many people find first dates nerve-wracking.  For me, as a former human resources professional, I was pretty comfortable most of the time because I found them similar to a job interview.  Each party is dressed well (usually) and on his or her best behavior, carefully monitoring what was said and what impressions were being made.  Often, they ask each other questions, very much like an interview, except the questions could be more personal.  Where are you from?  How long were you married?  How often do you see your children?  Each side is gathering information, trying to decide if he or she wants to continue the process.

If the whole idea makes your stomach tight, let me offer a few ideas on how to make it more comfortable for you (not on how to make a good first impression – that would be a completely different list).  First, carefully consider where you go.  A coffee date is usually short.  It happens in a public place and allows you (alright, forces you) to carry on a conversation during the entire time.  A movie date is longer and prevents you from talking to each unless you go out afterward, making the date even longer.  It takes place in the dark, where it’s not quite so public, so all-in-all I don’t recommend going to a movie as a first date. 

Having a drink where live music is playing is a good compromise, provided you can talk and hear yourselves over the music.  Be very aware of how much you drink.  Stay in control of yourself, and make sure you can safely drive home.  If you read my wellness articles, you probably know that health experts advise a limit of one drink for women and two for men.

Want more?  Join me next week for part two…